Adidas Grand Prix

This is the closest I’ve come yet to racing in a diamond league meet. I raced in an 800 at a diamond league meet but my race wasn’t at that standard. Thinking back on my race I’m optimistic and I’m strong but I gotta get my real fight back. I’m spending way too much time being passive, waiting too long to strike and getting myself boxed in. I should have won that race.

I felt good during warm-up and this was mostly due to the fantastic adjustment I had by the chiropractor the night before. I have been having a lot of stiffness in the front of my hips and it was really affecting my stride. I've had a lot of therapy for my hips but the focus has been on the front where the tightness is. It wasn’t until I had this deep adjustment to my left SI joint that I felt an almost immediate relaxation to my front left hip. It just goes to show you how everything is connected.

Back to the race, I felt strong at the start. We went out in 28 and unfortunately I went too far to the inside. It was windy so I though I would sit behind two girls and wait for an opening. The leaders slowed and we hit 61 for our 400 split, too slow and everyone caught up so we were in one big pack. Around 450 I should have started to speed up but I let the girl on my outside come up beside me and take my opening. I let her! I should have fought. By 200 it was 1:31/32 and I had to go wide. The leaders went and I tried to fight but not hard enough and finished in 2:04.02.

I had too much left at the end – this is relative to my normal down on the ground puking state. I need to get back there. To do this I needed to go earlier, around 350 I needed more time to fight. I feel great again I am back and I am strong so this makes me disappointed with my performance. I'm so grateful to be back here. During April and early May I would have killed to be in this place. 

 The only problem is now it's June and I need to run fast. To do this I need to be confident and take risks. Before my foot became really sore and I ran all the terrible 208’s, I told myself to go out in workouts harder than I thought I should and just see what happens. So that's the new plan it usually only feels slightly harder at the end. Anyways, 201 is my goal and I see it everywhere. I look at the clock, it’s 201, on cash at lulu total 201. It’s time to fight for it and get back there. Every race is a chance, every race is an opportunity!


xoxo
Becks

Start Spreading the News....NY NY

I’m on the road again it’s a little bumpy and kinda scary. Being 30 000 feet up and feeling like the plane might drop out of the sky makes it hard to relax but as I write this I’m sending mental messages to the plane and to god to not let that happen. It’s way too beautiful we just passed through the clouds and I’m appreciating a lovely sunset of pinks and blues. I’m Heading to New York for the Adidas Grande Prix.  I am so excited to be in this race, I got in thanks to my Occidental meet performance and I’m going to appreciate every moment!

It’s been a bit of a rollercoaster ride over these last few weeks. I’ve had some great workouts and some practices where I was forced to go easier than I wanted to. I’m looking at my last week as a forced extended taper that will make me feel fantastic in the race. I was really trying to listen to my body this week by sleeping and going easy so that whatever was making me feel stiff and exhausted would clear itself up.  It’s hard to go easier than I would like because I feel like I’ve been losing fitness but I believe this's necessary if I wanted to feel good this weekend.

I’m feeling better now, I realized that in these last two days my neck has become a lot thinner and a lot less painful.  It's weird that waking up with swollen glands was normal. I’m taking this neck reduction as a good sign and I’m using the workouts I did well in the two weeks prior to my taper to prove that I’m ready to race. 

xo Rebecca

Fighting Foggy Fatigue

I realize it's past 3pm on a Sunday and I'm still waiting to workout. Something in me disguised as this cloudy fatigue feeling is telling me to hold off.  I feel as if my body is putting in a huge fight protecting me against myself. My mind knows an important race is coming up and it's hyper-sensative to the fact that I've flipped a switch, I'm am able to run strong, but I'm not feeling 100%.

Workouts for the most part have been going well but they've felt harder than they should. This is probably because I was not resting and fighting thrush (in my throat). Either way when I'm not at my best I know it because my glands cyclically go up and down and my legs feel extra stiff at the hip joint. I've had good times through most of my runs but I've been pushing through stiff legs over the past two weeks.

It was last thursday at the hill when my invincibility caught up with me. I'll admit it, I'm over-worked and I know it. I've done everything I can to help my legs feel better: stretch, chiro, massage, ice. Everything that is, except listening to my body and resting. This brings me back to why I'm still sitting on the couch at 3pm.   I love my job but three evening shifts a week + travelling +racing + TRAINING = too much for me.  It's time for a realization and intervention before I find myself in the deep-rooted fatigue that became my last year.

The fact that I can admit I'm doing too much is a step in the right self discovery direction but I still seem to get myself in this place time and time again. Will I ever learn?  My goal this year should be so simple: to take it easy and not become overworked (which leads to overtired). Why is it so hard?

I partially believe my A-type personality is to blame. I realize this isn't an adequate excuse, I like to think of myself as a smart-ish type person who can see past the end of their own nose, but intrinsically I can't let myself do anything half-assed. Working part-time feels like a cop-out. I can't stand to feel like I'm not as involved as I possibly could be. Maybe A-type isn't the only thing to blame this time, maybe the real reason I find myself here again is the fear of running failure. It's kinda pathetic but maybe subconsciously I fill my life up with obligations so that if I don't run fast enough at least I'll have an excuse.

Whatever the reason I've had enough of this self-sabotage! When I feel good I know I can run fast. I know! I am strong and I can fight. The secret is I have to feel good to fight so this is my new plan of attack: address job situation by going down to 1 or 2 shifts a week, develop a social media plan so I can still be involved with the store but off my feet. For now this will be the plan, I know that if I address my work worries other things will fall into place. I know I can have a good race, this will be an easy/tapper week followed by a couple weeks of hard training. It's all coming together I'm feeling motivated, slightly less worried and I'm going to run as hard as I can!

xo Becks

Sore throat the usual culprit

It's been a lot of good running since I last posted but unfortunately I'm overly exhausted from it. I know why which is a relief but I shouldn't be as weak/tired as I feel. It started with this terrible sore throat - my usual culprit. I always have sore throats when the training gets tough so at first I though nothing of it. For about 4 days before the cali race I took it easier than normal to try and get over it. After I got back my throat got worse and it took me four or five days to realize this was a new one. The pain was different because it didn't change. My typical throat injury sees my glands go up at the end of the day as I become tired and after a good night's sleep I wake up back to normal. This cyclic motion wasn't the case, in this situation the pain was constant and my neck was stiff. I was forced to move my head slowly in every direction or face a painful slap. I decided to go to the doctor.

The doctor literally took a one second look into my throat and asked if I had asthma. My immediate response was CRAP! Ha, I said crap to the doctor! I knew I had thrush (in my throat). To avoid this infection a requirement of my breathing medication is to rinse out your mouth after ever use. I do this everyday but somehow it wasn't good enough (story of my running life ;)

I left the doctor feeling somewhat relieved, pissed but relieved because there was an answer to my fatigue. I've been taking the medicine for a few days now and it's working. I can shoulder check with less pain but I'm still feeling weak after hard workouts. I'm still grateful despite being tired because my track work is going well and my foot is holding up. For now it's lots of good sleeps and fast dreams.

xo
Becks

Back at Burnaby Lake

I began my run at 10am on a cloudy but mild sunday morning. I was back at my normal sunday run routine, meeting the girls at Burnaby Lake. Racing requirements and injury obligations have forced me to run in different locations so it's be awhile, a couple months in fact, since I've been at the lake. I didn't realize how much I missed it. It looked like a completely different place this time around. All of the vegitation was so much greener and thicker. It was like the trail was closing in on inself from all this growth. Despite the mild claustrophobia I love the feeling of running on the soft trails compared to the hard pavement. The seawall, although beautiful kinda beats you up after awhile. We followed our typical route around the lake including an out- and-back along the Burnette River. 65-minutes later we were back where we started and finshed with some good stretching.

I finished off my workout with a fantastic recovery brunch with my mom. We had the Milestones usual: 2 cups of coffee, eggs benny for mom and california omelette no bacon extra ketchup for myself. After an amazing meal and 3 coffee refills I finished my afternoon with an Aritzia purchase (bad I know) and a good nap. Not a bad Sunday!

A giant weight has been lifted

As you can see, I’m sitting by the pool relaxing on a very comfy lounge chair in Pasadena. I’m soaking up my last few hours of sun before I head back to rainy Vancouver. I just finished my Sunday run and I’m enjoying an Orange Overload juice it up smoothie. My Sunday run was exhausting. It has only been about 15 hours since my race so I’m ok with being a little tired. I did an out-and-back run so I wouldn't get lost in a new place.  When you don’t know where you’re going it’s easier mentally to run in one direction instead of trying to kill time doing laps of the neighbourhood. To my unfortunate realization, on this run, when I turned around at 30 minutes I learned I had been running with the wind. I spent the entire second half of my run battling the huge gusts of wind that kept trying to prevent me from getting back to my hotel.

Despite slogging through my run mentally I felt light as a feather, a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders. This is the first time I’ve been happy with my racing performance this year! For once I didn’t run an absolutely terrible 2:08! YES….

I didn’t realize how much of my energy has been devoted to my remaining positive while running terrible. It’s almost as exhausting as running itself. Looking back, I’m happy with how I’ve handled myself. I didn’t have any freak outs, well major freak outs, and I feel like I’m finally returning back to my normal running self. I have been keeping things in perspective. I know I can't let my running highs become too high or my running lows become too low. I've also been trying to focus on other amazing aspects of this fun life while waiting for a switch to flip.

Sitting here I keep thinking about racing. I’m looking forward to the next one instead of worrying who’s going to beat me. I am going to look at every race as an opportunity to show what I can do. I believe again, for real this time and I know I can run fast. I can finally race, I can fight, I have a chance.  I’m ready to take risks, kick ass and most importantly I’m going to love every minute. I’m so grateful to be able to run!

xoxo

Becks

A switch has been flipped!

I’m back baby, not only back but better than any race last year back (ha by .01). My time wasn’t all that fantastic but the fantastic part about it was I felt great! I’ve never been so happy to run 2:03.63. Today I could race, I was competitive and I had gears. The switch I’ve been praying for has FINALLY switched!

I was so excited to be part of this meet. It was very low-key but there was so much talent flowing out of every pore of the small stadium that it more than made up for it.

I didn’t know what to expect today. I’ve been taking it really easy because I’ve been fighting off a bit of sickness but I knew that my glands weren’t going to get in my way today. Warming up I was tight and I immediately began doubting myself. It's easy to justify my record doesn’t have much to speak of: tight hips and 208’s.  But about ¾ of my way through warm-up I passed a few amazing runners and realized the main difference between these runners and me is that they believe in themselves. Why am I doubting myself before I even start? It’s racing suicide.  As I passed those runners I immediately started to feel better,  I told myself to snap out of it. I told myself I’ve felt bad in warm-ups before and had great runs. I changed my attitude and made sure I was well warm up so I wouldn’t feel bad in the race due to oxygen debt.  

All I had to do today was sacrifice two minutes of my life to the run – my one max effort. Not a bad day at the office.

When the gun went off I tried to get into a good position. I went through 400 in 59-60 and was so pleased to be thinking omg I don’t feel terrible, I don’t feel like I won’t make it my legs are ok. I was in a bad spot at this point, on the outside pretty much in lane 2. I had another gear and I didn’t know when to use it because I didn’t want to waste too much energy on the curves. I hit 1:31 at 600-metres and kicked it with 150 to go. I was 4^th in my heat in 2:03.63. I think if I had gone a little earlier with about 250 to go I would have been faster.  I lost contact with the first three girls who ran the times I’m still praying to run. I think if I kept with them I could have put in a good fight. 

I keep thinking about how I should of done this or that and the outcome of the race would have been different. I’m telling my mind to stop now. I told myself if I ever got to even 205, with the way I have been feeling, I would be grateful. I am so grateful, I’m going to take this racing experience, learn from it and do even better next time. My fight is back, my determination is back and I’m so happy for it. The switch has flipped and I’m so looking forward to the rest of the season!

xo Rebecca